A week into my July goals, I’ve decided to switch gears. I still like the original list so I may make that my focus for August, but I know my efforts this month need to be in other areas (gotta love self-introspection). Instead of embracing life lessons I’m going to embrace positive change in my life (somewhat ironic given I’m changing my goals).
Put words into actions: It’s one of my guiding principles (“well done is better than well said”) yet I’m not all that great at it. Lindsay and I had a really great conversation yesterday about her class Monday night (I probably should just sneak into the class for as much as I talk about it…). The professor made a comment that more often than not, what people feel is a direct result of their own actions. Instead of having long, drawn out conversations about how someone is feeling, it’s better to focus the conversation on what you can do to change that feeling. If I’m feeling unhealthy, for example, it’s likely because I’m not working out or eating right. Instead of sitting around talking about how unhealthy I feel, I need to do something about it. My goal is to minimize my time spent venting about how frustrated or lazy I feel and instead make strides to improve that mood. Less talk, more action.
Practice positive thinking: Speaking of practicing what I preach, this could use some work. Last night I taught a segment on positive thinking and I realized that while I’m relatively good at being upbeat (my co-leader jokingly commented that it was a good thing I was the one teaching that component), that optimism is directed toward others and not myself. And it doesn’t even have to be related to the big things in life. Spinning is a great example for me lately (let me tell you, ladies and gentlemen, spinning is 90% mental). Going into an exercise class or even going into work is going to be a heck of a lot harder if I’m going into it with a negative mindset (“this is hard! I’m tired!”). Who wants that? And if I’m continually saying that out loud, who wants to be around that? It’s time to step up my positivity. Negativity and cynicism aren’t a good look on me anyway.
Be proactive in relationships and more direct with communication: If you were to look up the word passive aggressive in the dictionary, you’d probably see my picture. I know it’s ineffective at best, but old habits die hard. I’m trying to look at it from a new perspective to see if I can’t curb some of those negative impacts (I’m telling you, it’s ineffective at best). In some ways I’m relating it back to the comment Lindsay’s professor made. If I’m feeling upset or frustrated that I haven’t talked to a sister or friend, then I should be proactive about making that connection instead of being passive aggressive. If someone’s made a comment or done something that hurt my feelings, I need to address it instead of stewing about it and making that person jump through hoops to understand why I’m distant. At that point the ball is in my court and I need to do something about it, even if it means talking about my feelings (which seems a little contradictory to the first goal, but trust me, that part is needed for me).
These goals aren’t as measurable or concrete as I’d normally like, but they’re actually serving as my trial run for the second half of the year. These three things are pretty big over-arching changes I want (and probably need) to make in my life, and that was the intent of my monthly/yearly goals and theme. Let’s hope I can embrace positive change for the month of July and beyond!